Monday, September 11, 2006

Let's just call a spade a spade

Quite possibly the worst thing about giving birth is the 4-6 weeks of bleeding that follows. And let's not call it lochia. Let's call it what it is...the longest, most pain in the ass period EVER. Never having been a fan of my monthly visitor (except for the first one or two- can you believe I actually was happy to get the friggin thing? And that I actually bragged about it?) I rather dread the weeks after birth. Nothing is worse than the giant pad with the belt that I had to wear the first two days after Sophie's birth. Very "Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret." It made me look forward to my own nice thin pads.

Having gone nine months without a need for pads or tampons I was a little dismayed upon opening the first Always pad to read on the wings sticker "Have a happy period." Are these people mad? Who other than the teenage girl who prays not to be pregnant has a happy period? Not me anyway. Needless to say the next package purchase was wingless.

Thank God it's on its way out. If I get a period in 4 weeks like I did with Saoirse I will be plenty annoyed. It's one of the benefits of being a human cow. And I'm not talking about my weight.

6 comments:

Hoping said...

What?! A pad with the belt.....do they make those things anymore or are you just kidding? I have only heard of those things from my grandmother -- please elaborate ;)

Emma in Canada said...

They do and the pads are hugely thick with two long ends that stick through these little plastic things on the front and back of the belt. And it's really hard to attach them when you're not really all there and in a bit of pain.

Emmakirst said...

Ack, those belts=horrible. I had them when I had my first, 10 1/2 yrs ago. The nurses thought it'd be better to use those to try and spare my clothes. I learned to take my huge ass mattresses in on my own. And to not give a rats ass if i wrecked my pjs. Was ok after that. LOL.

Susan in va said...

Thank you for reminding me WHY I DON'T WANT TO GO THROUGH THIS AGAIN!!! Isn't it awful?? And if there are any men reading my comment, you may want to stop reading now.....And the smell is horrible!! I guess so when it's been cooped up inside your uterus for 9 months! I was just happy to smell like a normal person again.

Now, if you are a man and you read that, don't say I didn't warn you!

random_mommy said...

the belt sounds so scary! here, we just got a pair of unflattering mesh panties...

Emma in Canada said...

At first I thought "what smell?" and then I remembered. I must have blocked it out.

We have the mesh panties too, but can you believe I was told I could only have one pair for my 3 day stay? I had to wash them in the shower. I wonder how much they are per pair. I used extra pads though to make up for the cheapness of the hospital.