Oh, are you here for Fun Monday?

Well go here then. Go now, go on. I know my pregnancy was dreadfully entertaining, but really people you can come back later. Oh, and I know the baby is adorable. She's even cuter now at one. Try and avoid my fat have just given birth picture. Thanks for that.








What are you still doing here? Goooooo. My other blog is actually from this year. Really.

The 6 week check up (3 weeks late) and 2 month shots

Last Wednesday, Sophie had her 2 month shots and weigh in. She weighs 11lbs 14oz (75th percentile) and measures 22 1/4" (25th.) Oddly, while she weighed almost a pound less than Saoirse at birth (8 lbs to Saoirse's 8 15) she is almost a pound heavier than what Saoirse was at this point. Ah, the power of breastfeeding going well. She screamed bloody murder for the 3 shots, and tensed her leg so much so that the nurse commented on it. So all is well with her. She's doing great, a pure pleasure these days. Did I ever mention that for the first month I thought I was going to lose my mind? Thank God it's over.

I had my rescheduled postpartum appointment on the Friday. Sophie was fantastic, fell asleep while we were walking over and stayed asleep until we were back home. In the fantastic, I-am-so-bloody-proud-of-myself news I now weigh 10lbs less than when I got pregnant with Sophie. Only another thousand pounds to go. Well, not quite of course, it just feels like it. However, I have a bit of a yeast infection. I had no idea. I was asked what method of contraception we are using. I laughed at that one. With one or both girls in the bed every night, abstinence is the name of the game. Which completely sucks and hopefully will end soon. I am going to get the shots in my arm. As much as I hate needles, I hate the idea of swallowing a pill everyday and I never could get used to shoving things up there. So the shots it will be. Until they get banned anyway.

Oh, the injustice of it all

A wee while ago I wrote a post complaining about the 6 weeks worth of blood and whatnot that we are forced to put with after having experienced the joys of childbirth.

I had a week off. A WEEK. Last night I wiped away bloody discharge and actually screamed about it. This morning I had a full on period.

Bastard body.

What the hell is going on? The baby is breastfed ffs. She's only had 10 oz of formula in her short life. With Saoirse, who was a 50/50 split between the two, I got my period 4 weeks after the end of the original six. That pissed me off. But at least my body had the decency to wait a full cycle before torturing me with my period again.

Today was supposed to be my 6 week check up. I called to see if I could still come in and I was asked to reschedule. I now have to wait 2 weeks.

Well, at least I should be period free by then.

Hopefully.

What to do with this blog?

This blog was meant to be a pregnancy journal and now that the pregnancy is over I am not really sure where to go with it. I originally started a new blog because I was not overly happy about being pregnant and it wasn't something I really wanted to discuss in the other blog. (Funny that I was so upset then now I can't imagine my life without Sophie in it. Surprises always turn out to be the best things.) I can not just update about Sophie on here, which is what I've been doing. I think I am going to do one final post and then that'll be it. Sophie is six weeks old tomorrow and I still have not written her birth story. It's not as though it was traumatic or anything and so before I foget absolutely everything I had better do it.

And eventually I will. One day when I have a wee bit of time to sit back and remember.

Sophie will be 5 weeks old tomorrow. She has a hideous case of baby acne, so terrible I can not even post a picture of her until it has cleared. If this were a sign of her teenage years, the poor girl would be on serious medication. I mean, I'm her mother and even I don't think she's cute at the moment. I know. Terrible.

We went to Weight and See yesterday, she is now 10lbs 4 oz. I saw a lactation consultant as I thought I might have a plugged duct. I was actually in the hospital Saturday night because I thought it was mastitis. I had a fever of 41.1. (That'd be around 104 for the Americans out there.) I had a totally useless resident whose first words to me were "I know nothing about this." Thanks. Inspiring confidence in the masses I am sure. And why, oh why, do residents work 24 hours shifts? The poor guy was tired, he repeated the same questions and he did absolutely NOTHING for me. I didn't even see the actual doctor. This is what he came back. "Dr. R. says that if you're feeding off that breast it's not plugged." Ummmm...thanks again. What about the fact that three hours ago I could not feed off of that breast and in fact the bloody thing wasn't even leaking at all? What about that fever, the highest my temperature has ever been? Did I say anything? Of course not! I am me after all.

The lactation consultant was great, except for the fact that my boob was shown for all to see. A duct was plugged and it was my fault because the baby still isn't latching properly and because I hold my breast everytime and have actually stopped up a duct by doing so. Loser.

And that's about it. She's doing pretty well, still sleeping nights and little during the day.

Let's just call a spade a spade

Quite possibly the worst thing about giving birth is the 4-6 weeks of bleeding that follows. And let's not call it lochia. Let's call it what it is...the longest, most pain in the ass period EVER. Never having been a fan of my monthly visitor (except for the first one or two- can you believe I actually was happy to get the friggin thing? And that I actually bragged about it?) I rather dread the weeks after birth. Nothing is worse than the giant pad with the belt that I had to wear the first two days after Sophie's birth. Very "Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret." It made me look forward to my own nice thin pads.

Having gone nine months without a need for pads or tampons I was a little dismayed upon opening the first Always pad to read on the wings sticker "Have a happy period." Are these people mad? Who other than the teenage girl who prays not to be pregnant has a happy period? Not me anyway. Needless to say the next package purchase was wingless.

Thank God it's on its way out. If I get a period in 4 weeks like I did with Saoirse I will be plenty annoyed. It's one of the benefits of being a human cow. And I'm not talking about my weight.

One Month

Dear Sophie,
A month ago you came into our lives and I am so very happy to have you. How quickly one forgets what life like was like before a baby's arrival. I had forgotten what it was like to hold my pee in for 8 or so hours until someone else arrives that you will sit with for 45 seconds. Showers are a luxury and brushing my teeth before your morning nap (if you have one that is) is unheard of. If I want to go on the computer you are either in my arms or having a 10 minute cat nap. As soon as you realize you aren't in my arms you wake up. And honestly, Sophie, I wouldn't change one minute of the last month that I have had with you.


Your sisters and brother love you. Liam is even happy to have his picture taken with you. Watching Saoirse when she is around you makes us all laugh, she loves to give you hugs and kisses and is forever rubbing her hand on your head and face. She has though, discovered that she can kick you in the head during storytime, which would be whenever you are eating. We have to be careful there. My favourite time of the day is around 1.00 when you fall asleep while eating and Saoirse falls asleep next to us. We stay like that for awhile because not only do I love that quiet time with the two of you but there's always a chance you might actually sleep for an hour or so. I can then do a bit of cleaning or, more likely, watch Days of Our Lives.



You are starting to develop quite the personality. You let me know when you feel no one is paying attention to you and even when we pay too much attention. You smile whenever Daddy talks to you and mimic his facial expressions. You have just starting making a noise that sounds an awful lot like a laugh. Because you don't really like to be` out of someone's arms your Auntie Shelley bought us a sling, which you love. I love it too, becuase you are not a great fan of the pram either. In fact, you are quite fussy. But again, I wouldn't change a thing about you. Except for maybe that baby acne.


Dr. M was right when during the section she said "This one's really cute, Emma. Are you sure you want your tubes tied?"

Love you,
Mummy

Slowly, slowly, I am losing my mind

I have a feeling that gripe water is about to become my new best friend. I think that Sophie may have developed a wee bit of colic. Either that, or she has just decided to become the most miserable child on the face of the earth. Yesterday was the day from hell. I got nothing done. Everytime I put her down she cried. She fed all day long and for the most part I would say it was just comfort sucking. I was ready to put her back. Rip me open and leave her in there until this phase passes. I do not remember Saoirse being like this. Perhaps she was though and I just never noticed because a) she was always supplemented and b) William was there all the time.

And for some reason he is expecting the house to be lovely and clean and dinner always ready when he walks in the door. Um, ain't gonna happen. Last night when she was screaming in his arms I said this is what she did all day today so when you wonder why the house isn't clean now you know.

I wonder what how clean the house would be if he was at home with a 4 week old and a 22 month old even for one day? Not very I imagine.

It appears the vibrating chair only soothed her for a few minutes and now she is fussing again. It will be full fledged screaming in a minute so I am off.

Gotcha!

She wouldn't smile for me at all today but her dad had no such problems. I caught the tail end of this one.

I took Sophie and Saoirse over to Weight and See this afternoon. I was surprised to see she weighs 9lbs 12oz. We missed it last week, but I am assuming most of the weight gain came this past week, it seems all she's being doing is eating and sleeping. Considering her inital weight loss she has now gained 2lbs 3oz in just over 3 weeks. Not so shabby for a kid who still has a crap latch.

She slept through the night again, from 10- 6.30. I am so loving this girl. Oh, and we've lost the dummy but she doesn't seem to bothered without it. I am very pleased about this.

Happy babies

I spent Sophie's waking hours (of which there have oddly been very few) today trying to get her to smile for the camera. Of course she would stare intently at the camera looking like she was all pissed off and as soon as the camera was put away she would turn and look at me and smile. It seems I've a future troublemaker on my hands.

Looking to curse myself here, but after the worst couple of nights thus far last night Sophie slept from 10-7, woke up for an hour and a half and then slept until almost noon. She had another long nap this afternoon, woke up around 6 and then went back to sleep just after 7. What are the chances she will sleep at all tonight? Probably nil. Which will make me getting the kids ready for school tomorrow morning very unpleasant.

What NOT to do with your 20 day old baby

It appears that Sophie has mastered the art of the quarter roll. Lying on her back, she throws her arm down over her tummy and rolls onto her side. She has being doing this for ages. Well, ages in the life of a 3 week old, which would be about 2 weeks. Until last night though, she always ended up right back on her back as she came up just a wee bit short of fully being on her side.

I lay her on the sofa as I always do, and went to get her sleeper off the other sofa. And then I heard the dreaded sound. THUNK. Followed by a second of silence and then the loudest scream I have heard out of her yet. When I turned around she was on her tummy on the floor. Yikes.

I think that all of my children have fallen off the couch at one time or another. But never at 3 weeks. Needless to say I was feeling terrible. She stopped crying the moment I picked her up and for the next two hours, everytime she fell asleep I would get all worried and eventually wake her up. I thought about calling the Healthy Beginnings number, but decided that I was being a complete eejit. When I took her up to bed I had a hard time falling asleep and kept touching her stomach to make sure she was breathing. She woke up at 3.30 and I was so happy she was alright that I wasn't even bothered by the fact that she woke up and hour and half earlier than normal. She ate and went back to sleep and I kept her in my arms. When she woke up at 7.30 I fed her while lying in bed, the first time she has done that. And that is the second best thing about breast feeding...not having to get up to feed. We then had a lovely lie in until 9.30 when Saoirse woke up.

She has been fine all day, no problems for her fall. It was our first Britney Spears moment with many to follow I am sure.

A little thing that freaks me out

I think she was 6 days old in this picture. I thought I would be so great at remembering the dates and whatnot but since I am currently lucky I remember the names of all four children (but not necessarily calling the right child by the right name) the chances of actually remembering dates is slim to none. The date is set on the camera, but I have no idea how to retrieve it. So I just think she was 6 days old. But she could have been 7, as her one week photos immediately follow this one. Ack! Tis driving me crazy! Must figure out camera.

But on to what freaks me out.

Sophie falls asleep in my arms. Like most mothers, I am sure, sometimes I just sit and stare at her. Sometimes, though, I read. It is the only chance I get these days. She quite often opens her eyes a wee bit and I watch her eyeballs roll back in her head. I know all babies do this, I assume that we all do it in our sleep. But it totally freaks me out. To the point where I make sure the phone is near by so that if I have to call 911 I can do it quickly.

Stupid? Yes. Irrational? Totally.

In my head I know she is fine. But every single time she does it I think of a girl I was friendly with years ago. She had a little boy, Matthew, back in October of 1998. I visited with her in the hospital the evening of the day he was born. She was eager to get home the next day as they had a 2 year old daughter she was missing. I said that I would take every moment they would let me stay. That's just me, I think, I rather enjoy being in the hospital. Excluding the fact that youget no sleep it's actually rather peaceful.

She went home the day after Matthew was born and all was fine. The next morning, at around 7.30, when he was exactly 48 hours old, she was holding him in her arms when his eyes rolled back in his head. I can not remember what else happened to him for her to know there was something wrong, there might have been something, there might not have. I only remember her saying "His eyes rolled right back in his head" as we talked on the phone, both of us crying. She called her husband, they called an ambulance, they tried to revive him on the kitchen table. He was pronounced dead at the hospital. I often wonder if he would have survived had they still been in the hospital.

Anyway, this is what I think of everytime I see Sophie's eyes start to roll. I know it's not going to happen to us, but I can't help thinking it. And every time she closes her eyes, and continues on with her steady (and somewhat noisy) breathing, I myself breathe a sigh of relief.

Time flies

This has not been the best week. I'd forgotten how hard it is with two babies, let's all be thankful I am not the mother of twins because chances are I would be on the psych ward right about now. I honestly don't know how those mums do it. And, yes, the dads too. I am not trying to be gender biased here, but I'll assume most dads are out at work and the mums are at home.

Sophie has decided that she is no longer willing to sleep on her own, in the cot right next to the bed. She'll go half the night, but once 3 or 4 hits and she wakes up, she ends up falling back to sleep in in my arms. Which equals two not so skinny adults, one toddler who kicks her father in the back all night and a two week old baby in the bed. Not so much fun really.

We are both suffering from a lack of a good nights sleep and unfortunately we seem to take it out on one another. I wish we were one of those couples that never said a nasty word to one another. Although I'd not trade him for the world. I just have to learn to brush off the bad moods. His and mine.

I had my home help in on Wednesday. She took Saoirse and Taylor out and Sophie and I slept for 3 hours. It was fantastic! She's due to come two times next week. She says she will make meals, so I might take her up on that. I may have said before that there is nothing I hate more than cooking. She was quite nice, it seems like an interesting job, she works with all sort of people; from seniors to new mothers to child welfare cases. I was starting to wonder if there was another reason as to why she was visiting me, other than c-section/toddler scenario; perhaps the maternity ward had actually charted my minor breakdown? Who knows. Anyway, she visits teen mums, new immigrants and drug addicted mums among others. It wasn't until she said something about a teacher "like you" (as in the c-section/toddler scenario) that I realized I was not being watched for some massive case of post partum depression or something. Hmmm...perhaps they should be watching out for a massive case of paranoia.

Sophie had her 2 week check up yesterday. She weighed 8lbs 8oz at it, which I think is a bit high as she did not have a new nappy on, and there was probably a bit of weight to the one she was in. She was marked as a healthy 2 week old, and won't need to be seen until a week after her 2 month shots. She wasn't officially discharged from the hospital, or so I had thought. Usually a doctor will come in and talk to you, and all of the others were checked out by a doctor in my presence, but Sophie was looked at by a resident while she was in the nursery I assume and he did not come in to talk to me. I didn't know this until the doctor showed me her chart. I was a bit pissed off about it, not to talk to the mother seems not a great way to practice pediatric medicine. Taylor had hip dysplasia and had to wear a Pavlik harness for a few months. It was caught at that first check by the doctor and if I had been more together on that last day in the hospital I would have questioned why I had not seen a doctor in regards to Sophie. I guess I can finally throw that harness away, I have saved it all these years in case I ever had another baby with dysplasia and now there is no need for it. It was $130 11 years ago, I hate to think of what it would cost now.

Blah...I have gone on, haven't I?

On to the cute...Saoirse seems to think that since everyone else can pick Sophie up, she must be able to as well. Right now she is content to just put her hands on either side of her while someone else does the actual picking up but today she did manage to pull her down the sofa a wee bit so it looks like we'll be keeping a close on her. Sophie is the queen of the dirty looks, I am trying to get a picture of it, but have not managed thus far. She furrows her brow and just stares at you, I wonder what goes through her head. Today she looked directly at Liam when he talked to her. She had to lift her head and roll her eyes up to do it, as she was lying in my arms and he was at my side. It was very sweet. And that's about it for cuteness this week, other than that there's a lot of crying and pooping.

She's a pleasure though.


Sleeping, and not in my arms!

A comparison with Cookie Monster, Saoirse's big sister gift. Either he's very big or she's very tiny.

Weight and See

I took Sophie and Saoirse over to the health clinic about 6 blocks away from our house. They have a program for newborns called "Weight and See" which you can use until the baby is 8 weeks old. They weigh them, obviously, and help you out with breastfeeding or whatever. Sophie weighed 8lbs at birth and was 7lbs 9oz at 3 days. Today, at 12 days, she is 8lbs 3oz. They were pleased with this as they expect them to be at birth weight by 10 days. I had no questions about breastfeeding, although she still doesn't have the perfect latch, but it isn't hurting and obviously she is gaining.

I booked her shots on my way out. They are scheduled for October 11th. Poor baby, I feel for her already. I was going to have Saoirse weighed as well as I think she has suddenly put on a lot of weight but that could simply be because she seems giant compared to Sophie. Needless to say, she was in no mood to be weighed.

I am supposed to be having someone come out to the house for 3 hours tomorrow afternoon. This is another program offered by Capital Health. Because I had a c-section and have a toddler at home I am entitled to 15 hours home help. They will come out and clean or watch your kids. I don't know why I said yes, I am not one for making converstaion with strangers, plus as I pointed out to her I would have to have my house clean prior to her arrival, not have her do it. She said "We don't like to see a clean house, then we know you've been doing too much." My main floor is fine, God forbid if she were to go upstairs where not one of the four bedrooms is completely unpacked. So I really have nothing for her to do. I don't want her doing my laundry, Saoirse would not stay alone with her so that I could nap (and I would LOVE a nap) and I have nothing else to be done. I don't have a number to cancel it though.

Other than that, all is well with the baby, she is actually sleeping on her own which is astounding as most of this week she will only sleep near me during the day. Mostly doing well at night, slept from 9-4 last night and again from 4.30-8.